Monday, January 7, 2008

happily even after

i've been thinking a lot about coping... and about how different people cope with grief and sadness.

my first instinct is to withdraw from the world around me. i almost feel as though my sadness is palpable to strangers, so i walk with my head down to avoid looking anyone in the eye.

i'm not sure this is right, but i'm not sure what is right, or if there even is a right or wrong when it comes to coping mechanisms.

i also cope by writing. i know a lot of people do that. it's interesting to me that many people don't. writing is such a release for me. i wonder how someone who never writes releases all the feelings that are left pent-up. i mean, someone who doesn't even seem to have any other outlet...

unless fucking is an outlet.

just another thing i cannot understand, no matter how hard i try.

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